We are overdue. After an eventful Friday night and Saturday of non-Braxton Hicks style contractions as well as a few new symptoms, Kyle and I were convinced I was in early labor. Well, the funny thing about early labor is that it can last for a few hours to days to even weeks. It's the preparation time before you go into active labor, but it doesn't give the laboring mother any assurance that the baby's arrival is eminent. After a nap on Saturday afternoon followed by an awesome night of sleep, all these contractions came to a halt. I felt a little responsible for resting too much and maybe ending my progress. Naively we had started to believe the baby would come on his due date.
Well, since my body slowed down, I became determined to try to bring on labor using many of the old wives' tale tips. I've been eating lots of spicy foods, going for long walks and doing squats with my husband, and doing house chores galore to try to kick this miraculous event into high gear. Yesterday Kyle joined me at my doctor's office to see if my flurry of activity and diet swaps had yielded any progress. Happily we learned that I'm now at 3cm and baby's station is -1 (basically as low as he can go before the main event). I went ahead and had my membranes stripped to try to catalyze labor, too. It was a fortunate event because I learned that poor sweet Kyle can easily get woozy in my medical situations~ a very important fact to know before labor and delivery. Poor buddy started sweating, lost all color in his face, started to hyperventilate, and got very dizzy. My friendly midwife treated him to a restorative juice box before we left the office.
After an afternoon of doing laundry, dishes, sweeping the porch and moving our wicker furniture around (this amazing weather has yielded a couple of wonderful mornings of outdoor Bible study!), and a few other miscellaneous tasks, I was more hopeful than ever that my body would respond. Last night I started to feel super sick~ nausea and tummy aches galore mixed with contractions. I was so excited because it was a new sensation~ perhaps it was that long awaited labor! Alas, it was not meant to be. I had a sleepless night not because of contractions (those disappeared) but terrible back pain (I'm afraid which were the result of so much activity). I hit a low this morning fearing that if I went into labor now, I couldn't imagine getting through it with so much pain in my back and so little sleep. I was terribly discouraged, but Kyle lifted my spirits with a back rub and so many words of encouragement. I also could feel my little baby dancing while I cried; how can you stay sad when you can feel baby's hands and feet wiggling away?
Today is a day of rest. I have been praying a lot and relearning the lesson everything is in God's timing~ not mine. In spite of my best efforts, I can't make my baby come any sooner. I've been reading Old Testament baby stories, and in each story God is a prominent player. Abraham's wife Sarah was 90 years old when she learned she would have a son. Not only was God's sovereignty intrinsic in the elderly woman's ability to conceive; I have no doubt that he sustained her during Isaac's birth. God's will determines Rebekah's, Leah's, Rachel's, and Hannah's ability to have babies. He blesses both Ruth and Samson's mother with special baby stories. Of course I haven't read about Christ's birth recently, but Mary certainly was comforted by God while giving birth in a house for animals with only her husband who had zero experience in the birthing department (Joseph may never have even seen Mary unclad). I have to believe that God is intimately involved in childbearing when babies are often at the heart of significant accounts of women in the scripture.
To testify a bit about the blessing of my pregnancy, you should know that I was a rebellious girl in my teen years. I indulged in self-gratifying and impulsive activities including pre-marital sex with 3 of my high school boyfriends (though it should be noted that I wasn't dating all 3 at once~ that's a bit wild even for old Leah). I had decided at orientation for college that I wanted a clean start and maybe even commit myself to Christ. It was at that time I learned I had HPV~ a sexually transmitted disease that can lead to cervical cancer. Throughout the first year and a half of college, I had 5 procedures/surgeries to excise abnormal cells. Once I started have a clear bill of health, I thought, "thank goodness the HPV chapter of my life is behind me". I had no idea it would become a factor in pregnancy.
At my first OB appointment, I learned that because I had had so many surgeries on my cervix, I would have to have an ultrasound every month to make sure my cervix was strong or healthy enough to prevent premature labor. That much trauma to that particular area yields risks for expecting moms. Blessing #1 in Pregnancy I Attribute to God: Not only was my cervix completely normal, Kyle and I enjoyed the benefit of peaking at baby every 4 weeks and witnessing his healthy growth. It is a privilege that we did not take for granted. Apart from God, I cannot imagine something as awful as an STD yielding something so wonderful as being reassured monthly that we have a healthy boy. Furthermore, it was by his grace that my body had healed well enough after the procedures that I was not reduced to bed rest for months but rather enjoyed a very active lifestyle throughout these past 9 months.
Another risk factor discovered early in my pregnancy was placenta previa. This meant that my placenta was forming on top of the cervix~ it's a condition that guarantees a C-section because your special baby organ is blocking the baby's exit route on delivery day. Undiagnosed (which doesn't happen much in Western countries with good healthcare), it can cause serious complications including hemorrhaging for the mother, brain damage for the baby, or potentially death for both mother and baby. Blessing #2 in Pregnancy I Attribute to God: By the second trimester it was determined that my placenta had moved as my uterus was growing and no longer was a risk. In this instance I praise God for answering my prayers to have it heal. There is nothing a doctor can do or I could do to change my prognosis. Kyle and I prayed my placenta would move, and we give God the credit for that answered prayer.
How can I waiver in my faith now when God gives me both the scriptures and the experience of witnessing his faithfulness to me throughout the pregnancy? My prayers now are for the courage and ability to endure labor as well as receive good treatment from my good physicians. In all circumstances whether with pitocin or a C-section with general anesthesia, I know my God will be with me. I hope to be spoiled with a more natural/normal birth because he's spoiled me all along, but if not, I really have nothing to fear. At the end of it all, I will get to meet my son (and likely have to redirect my prayers to the topic of nursing and sleeping).
So many thoughts... here's the update on our time table if you've made it this far. Friday I have an appointment to have an ultrasound done to see if my amniotic fluid levels are good. If not, then Kyle and I will check into the hospital to have labor induced. If all is good, we get to return home and pray labor comes quickly. Monday is our deadline. If baby hasn't come by Monday, we will definitely be admitted to the hospital and be induced. By next Tuesday (August 23rd) at the latest we will celebrate baby boy's birthday. My great hope today is that I get to cancel both those appointments, but we'll just take it day by day and not beat myself up too bad if we do have to keep those appointments.
Hope you are doing well. I'm not going to jinx myself by saying my next entry will be baby boy's introduction to the web world. Instead I'll just say à bientôt!
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